So...I've figured out how to make a deterministic quote, a free will quote.
I'm sure you've heard of the saying: "everything happens for a reason". I happen to agree, but not with the popular interpretation of it.
The quote is intended to mean that it's all part of the master plan, for the greater good, to teach you a lesson, etc.
If we were to put this into perspective: you got dumped because there must be someone out there who's better for you/that person wasn't "the one".
I look at the quote & infer that there's a purpose to everything. Not a divine purpose, or a cosmic purpose, but simply that there's a purpose for it. Something "happens" because someone has willed for it to happen. There was a cause, and this is an effect. Similarly, if we put this one into perspective, using the previous example: you got dumped because the person wanted to dump you. End of story.
That's it. Maybe my way's pessimistic...or maybe it's real. Maybe there is no grand agenda that "god" has planned out for us. Things happen for a reason...but that reason isn't to serve YOUR purpose - it's to serve the purpose of the person who made it happen. Do you see where I'm going with this?
I think that we need to quit with the ego-centric inflation that we give ourselves by comforting ourselves when we say that it serves us or was meant to teach us a lesson.
It doesn't work that way, it never has, and it never will. Sometimes, we're just shit out of luck.
This sort of goes to show how easy it is to see a quote & interpret it as how everyone else has always interpreted it. Perspective plays a huge role in understanding (or lack of it). You should always be able to break down maxims(no, not the magazine, you nasty) thrown at you.
It also goes to show that in the grand scheme of things, not every thing is a lesson or even should be. I don't know about you...but I'd be pretty angry if I potentially lost the greatest person I've ever met because god/alpha/the universe/the cosmos wanted me to learn a lesson.
But then again, maybe it's just me.
Peace,
-knowledge
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Everything Happens For A Reason
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mmmmm. MAXIMMM..lol
ReplyDeleteAnywayz, ha this is pretty good I have to agree I'm kind of upset I'm only commenting now. Well, this post kind of reminds of "He's just not that into you." (the movie of course) I don't know if you watched that movie but it was great and it kind of talked about how girls would tell other girls that got dumped that "you're too good for him" or "you can do better" in order to inflate or give confidence to that person. And it is true it's sort of counter productive if you look at the bigger picture because yes we are lying to ourselves. BUT!
I believe it's good, or actually necessary for such lies to be told. Why? Because it's important that people feel good about themselves. It's important that you feel that whatever you did is okay because it'll keep one's psyche from being sensitive to, too much insecurity. Sometimes it's not enough to just say well you fucked up just because! That's harsh, because then we'd all stop trying. What's life going to be like if people just get dissappointed and they realize that they made a mistake just because they do and they'll make it again. I think it's a nice thing to hear and it motivates people to look to the future when they think it's all part of learning a lesson and moving foreward when something bad happens. Maybe I'm just overly optimistic but come on, isn't it better to look at the bright side than the gloomy side. "You got dumped because someone wanted to dump you end of story" yeah yeah yeah, but why did they want to dump that person maybe that person is too boring or not enough or whatever whatever but that's still a reason. The reasoning behind is that person doesn't see him/her in that person's life meaaning you move on to bigger and better or more fitting things. you know? That's the reasons not really big cosmic things but were all living organisms like oil and water don't mix because their molecules or particles (I'm not much of a science nerd anymore) don't mix so eventually people figured it out and mixed other things together like *drum roll please* wine and oil and its yummy! See perfect combo. So I say failed relationships are just oil and water not mixable but oil and water will eventually find something else to mix with to make them yummy. LOL O gosh this what you call dragging on pointless things HAPPY NEW YEAR ALVIN! Let's have lunch!
@ katralber
ReplyDelete"I believe it's good, or actually necessary for such lies to be told. Why? Because it's important that people feel good about themselves."
To each their own, but I don't think you should have to lie to yourself to make yourself feel better. It doesn't change the truth - which is what's left once you realize that you're only fooling yourself.
"Sometimes it's not enough to just say well you fucked up just because! That's harsh, because then we'd all stop trying."
Not at all, I'd rather realize that I fucked up and that it's all my fault, than to try and comfort myself by saying that "maybe it was for the best." A mistake's a mistake - the lessons that you learn are only secondary.
"Maybe I'm just overly optimistic but come on, isn't it better to look at the bright side than the gloomy side. "
But there's a point where optimism becomes stupid. It's more about being realistic, and in most cases, to be realistic requires a lot negativity. That's just how it is, and I'm perfectly fine accepting that.
- knowledge
see this is when it gets blurry for me, what is realistic? ( I don't feel like ciiting my source right now) "expressed or represented as accurate" what if for one person what's realistic is that you make mistakes and you learn from it. And for that person the truth about mistakes is what you get from it not the pain or embarassment. Isn't it logical to look and productive to look at mistakes like that rather than discouragingly? (if thats a word it sounds like it) I'm surprised because in my experience especially, from what I know of you, you tend to, I don't know like to thinnk of things efficiently and the efficient way of looking at mistakes is looking at it as a lesson with purpose. I believe that if you look at a mistake and just well consider it just a mistake it makes it useless and a waste of time. Isn't it a better use of your time to analyze it and learn from it rather than just looking at it and realizing "oh i made a mitake. okay." It's not okay,I say the habit of looking at that mistake and saying "oh I made a mistake, it's not okay I'll do better I'll learn from this" And I do believe that's a positive way of looking at it but at the same time I believe that it's a 'realistic' way of thinking as well. Realistic in a way that most of us think this way and it has worked for most us for years. Isn't it why planning is so important? So we can mistakes and get better for it. I believe that yes it's to each their own, if negativity keeps you going then I'm happy for you, I guess that feeds your determination but I find it really unhealthy to be negative it's not good for the heart. And arguably happiness keeps you alive longer health wise. I'm not saying that it's part of a big written plan but I say everything does happen for a reason, a reason to get better to improve to be a better person so you can what you want faster, to get to places faster, to be happier, to be richer, to be prettier and all that jazz. Because we should all strive to be our best regardless not for others but for ourselves.
ReplyDelete^ I don't see what you disagree with. You also could've said all of that in about edited5-6 sentences :P
ReplyDeleteMy main point was that shit doesn't happen so you can learn from it...any lessons you learn from it are secondary. You'd be stupid to think that the mistake was made so that you could learn from it. You DO learn from it, but that isn't the point of making the mistake. You don't purposely make errors in judgment to learn lessons...but you CAN learn lessons from your errors in judgment, as a side-effect.
- knowledge
@ katralber
ReplyDeleteI understand where you're coming from but when you "lie to yourself" to gain confidence or tell your friends lies when they get dumped if you want to stick to the "he's just not that into you" example isn't that only putting the blame on someone else? I don't really see how trying to say that everything happens for a reason in a deterministic sense is more productive than looking at it as an effect of somethign that had happened. To me, if you understand something as an effect because of some causality then you'd be able to realize what went wrong, assess the situation and then learn from it. When you look at it as a sort of lesson that life gave you because it was supposed to happen for some unforsaken reason then how are you supposed to really take responsibility for your faults and learn from them. I do see that you learn lessons from them but I think that by understanding that things happened because of a mistake, and this doesn't have to be a mistake you made because I think that that's how you interpreted what alvin said, it could be something with the other person if we're talking about a relationship, then you'd be better able to learn from it.
@ knowledge
I think that when you used the example of getting dumped in the "something happens because someone has willed it to happen example", it didn't do your purpose justice because it sounds like it happened so that's it. end of story. nothing else to think of. If you had said, "you got dumped because the person wanted to dump you. it's not the world trying to teach you a lesson, it's a mistake that you should reflect on and move on with it." it would've been better?
I do agree that life should not be looked at in a Hard Deterministic fashion and sometimes shit just happens but it is important to reflect about why things happened and learn from it. Afterall, "A life unexamined is a life not worth living"- Socrates
-Jen
@ Jen:
ReplyDelete"you got dumped because the person wanted to dump you. it's not the world trying to teach you a lesson, it's a mistake that you should reflect on and move on with it." it would've been better?
But that's exactly what I don't believe in. It happens, and you can choose to learn from it afterwards. You don't necessarily have to take a lesson from it. Maybe there's nothing to learn, or maybe there is... but that's all secondary.
I think a more suitable quote would be:
"life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards" - Soren Kierkegaard
- knowledge
I see what you're saying. Kierkegaard's quote is a really good fit and a great existentialist too lol
ReplyDelete-Jen
I completely agree with the fact its not the third persons fault. But I have to disagree with your statement "If you want to blame anyone...blame yourself for not being good enough".
ReplyDeleteHow does that person blame themselves if the reason their significant other cheated, was with someone more attractive. So how are they supposed to blame themselves?
In my opinion, the fault has to be 100% on the person who cheated. Cause that person has the choice to choose whether or not to sleep with another person. Also, another scenario is if the significant other finally realizes that he or she is gay
- Adrian